Arti Cinta
Arti Cinta Buat apa aku tertarik kepada seorang wanita karena parasnya, jika keelokan parasnya itu dapat menyesatkan ku nantinya. Apalagi seandainya aku hanya tertarik kepada kekayaannya, bukankah kekayaan itu dapat musnah.
Ehm,…akhirnya kesimpulanku jatuh pada penalaran bahwa yang paling baik bagi ku adalah tertarik kepada wanita yang dapat membuatku tersenyum, karena memang hanya senyum yang dapat membuat hari-hari gelap ku menjadi cerah. Semoga aku menemukan wanita seperti itu.
Suatu saat nanti akan ada juga tahap dalam kehidupanku, ketika aku sangat merindukan seseorang pujaan hati, sehingga ingin sekali menjemputnya dari alam mimpi dan memeluknya dalam alam nyata. Semoga saja aku tidak hanya selalu bermimpi…
Tapi, jika pun harus diawali dengan mimpi, akan ku utamakan mimpi tentang apa yang selalu menari dalam imajinasiku. Pergi ke tempat-tempat yang ingin kusinggahi. Menjadi manusia seperti yang ku harapkan, karena aku hanya memiliki satu kehidupan dan satu kesempatan untuk melakukan hal-hal yang ingin ku lakukan. Ya Tuhan Ku,…semoga aku mendapatkan kebahagiaan yang cukup untuk membuat ku baik hati, cobaan yang cukup untuk membuat ku kuat, kesedihan yang cukup untuk membuat ku manusiawi, pengharapan yang cukup untuk membuat ku bahagia dan uang yang cukup untuk membeli yang kubutuhkan. Dan tetapkanlah aku pada satu keyakinan, bahwa ketika satu pintu kebahagiaan ku tertutup, pintu yang lain pasti akan dibukakan. Meskipun acap kali aku terpaku terlalu lama pada pintu yang tertutup sehingga tidak melihat pintu lain yang dibukakan bagi ku.
Mengenai Hidup ku,…dipenuhi oleh manusia-manusia yang berada di sekelilingku, entah siapa dan dari mana mereka berasal. Tapi yang paling kuingat hanyalah kalian…Sahabatku. Sahabat terbaik adalah dia yang dapat duduk berayun-ayun di beranda takdir bersamaku, walau tanpa mengucapkan sepatah katapun. Mereka lebih senang mendengar segala keluh kesah ku yang seakan tak pernah usai. Setelah itu, aku dapat sejenak pergi dengan perasaan tenang, karena telah bercakap-cakap lepas dengan mereka melalui hati. Patut juga diingat bahwa kita tidak tahu apa yang kita miliki sampai kita kehilangannya, tetapi sungguh benar pula bahwa kita tidak tahu apa yang belum pernah kita miliki sampai kita mendapatkannya.
Pandanglah segala sesuatu dari kacamata orang lain. Apabila hal itu menyakitkan hatimu, sangat mungkin hal itu menyakitkan hati orang lain pula. Kata-kata yang diucapkan sembarangan dapat menyulut perselisihan. Kata-kata yang kejam dapat menghancurkan suatu kehidupan. Kata-kata yang diucapkan pada tempatnya dapat meredakan ketegangan. Kata-kata yang penuh cinta dapat menyembuhkan dan memberkahi. Awal dari cinta adalah membiarkan orang yang kita cintai menjadi dirinya sendiri, dan tidak merubahnya menjadi gambaran yang kita inginkan. Jika tidak, kita hanya mencintai pantulan diri sendiri yang kita temukan di dalam dia. Orang-orang yang paling berbahagia tidak selalu memiliki hal-hal terbaik, meraka hanya berusaha menjadikan yang terbaik dari setiap hal yang hadir dalam hidupnya. Mungkin Tuhan menginginkan aku bertemu dengan beberapa orang yang salah sebelum bertemu dengan orang yang tepat, yang paling penting aku harus mengerti bagaimana berterimakasih atas karunia itu.
Dan jika boleh bercerita, aku ini hanya memerlukan waktu semenit untuk menaksir seseorang, sejam untuk menyukai seseorang dan sehari untuk mencintai seseorang, tetapi jika untuk melupakan seseorang aku memerlukan waktu seumur hidup.
Aku memandang kebahagiaan sebagai perasaan yang tersedia bagi mereka yang menangis, mereka yang disakiti hatinya, mereka yang mencari dan mereka yang mencoba. Karena hanya mereka itulah yang menghargai pentingnya orang-orang yang pernah hadir dalam hidup mereka. Sedangkan perasaan cinta yang dalam adalah jika meskipun kamu kehilangan rasa, gairah, romantika tetapi masih tetap perduli padanya. Sedangkan hal yang menyedihkan dalam hidup adalah ketika kamu bertemu seseorang yang sangat berarti bagimu dan mendapati pada akhirnya bahwa tidak demikian adanya, malah kamu harus melepaskannya.
Pandanganku untuk ‘cinta’ zaman sekarang, awalnya dimulai dengan sebuah senyuman, kemudian bertumbuh dengan sebuah ciuman dan berakhir dengan tetesan air mata. Sudah sangat jarang ditemui cinta yang datang kepada mereka yang masih berharap sekalipun pernah dikecewakan, kepada mereka yang masih percaya sekalipun pernah dikhianati, kepada mereka yang masih mencintai sekalipun pernah disakiti hatinya. Mungkin aku hanya sesorang yang termasuk dalam kelompok kecil itu. Tapi secara jujur pengalaman mengajarkan aku…, sungguh menyakitkan mencintai seseorang yang tidak mencintai ku, tetapi lebih menyakitkan adalah mencintai seseorang dan tidak pernah memiliki keberanian untuk mengutarakan cintaku kepadanya.
Dari hal itu aku kemudian berpandangan bahwa masa depan yang cerah selalu tergantung pada masa lalu yang dilupakan. Aku tidak dapat hidup terus dengan baik jika tidak melupakan kegagalan dan sakit hati di masa lalu. He..he..he..memang jiwa manusia itu selalu dipenuhi dengan kelemahan dan keraguan, sehingga aku selalu saja berusaha menggapai cintanya walaupun sudah terasa mustahil. Tapi itu juga karena aku percaya akan takdir Ilahi yang menentukan segalanya. Sehingga aku seharusnya jangan pernah mengucapkan selamat tinggal jika aku masih mau mencoba, jangan pernah menyerah jika aku masih merasa sanggup dan jangan pernah katakan aku tidak mencintainya lagi jika aku masih tidak dapat melupakannya Dengan suatu kesadaran yang bertambah bahwa memberikan seluruh cintaku kepada seseorang bukanlah jaminan dia akan membalas cinta ku. Jangan mengharapkan balasan cinta, tunggulah sampai cinta berkembang di hatinya, tetapi jika tidak, berbahagialah karena cinta tumbuh di hatimu. Selalu bersikap tegar dan siap untuk hal-hal yang sangat ingin aku dengar meskipun yang ku dengar dari orang tersebut tidak seperti yang diharapkan.
Namun demikian, aku tak akan menulikan telinga untuk mendengar perkataanya dengan sepenuh hati. Inti yang paling penting dari segala pemahamanku tentang cinta dan hidup adalah, aku tidak ingin melupakan makna sakral yang dapat dipetik dari sejarah terlahirnya diriku di dunia. Waktu terlahir, aku menangis dan orang-orang di sekelilingku tersenyum.
Artinya aku akan menjalani apa adanya hidup ku sehingga pada waktu meninggal, aku tersenyum dan orang-orang di sekelilingku menangis. Semoga disaat aku telah tiada nanti, telah kugapai cinta dan tujuan hidupku yang lain, sehingga aku dapat mengucapkan selamat tinggal pada dunia dengan tersenyum, disertai tangis sesal mereka karena pernah menyia-nyiakan aku ketika hidup.
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